What to listen to if you are infected with popular disease 'COVID-19'

 Like most people on this planet, I recently became infected with smash hit disease 'COVID-19.' In between slurping on tasteless cups of soup and shivering, I found that I had a lot of time in prison isolation to listen to some fun and exciting new things. So naturally, I played the same three Steve Hauschildt albums on repeat.

However! That doesn't make for a good blog post! And this ol' thing has not been updated since... 2018?! Time to get to work.

Cosmic Foxhole presents... 

~What to listen to if you are infected with popular disease 'COVID-19'~

1. In Amber by Hercules and Love Affair

You might remember Hercules and Love Affair from their catchy collaboration with Anohni back in the day, singing exuberant disco songs about... turning blind? Well, forget that. Anohni is still there, but they're full of goth rage now. There are lots of songs about being disappointed with religious institutions, and why not have some melancholic f-slur, as a treat. Makes sense that this album is the perfect soundtrack for that little window of time where you gasp for air between coughing. YOLO never sounded scarier!

2. Aerial by Kate Bush

So apparently Ms. KB is 'having a moment' thanks to her (admittedly excellent) song 'Running Up That Hill' being featured in Stranger Things. But, target audience, you have COVID-19! And after struggling through one SEVENTY MINUTE EPISODE, you decided that maybe you should stick to the sustainable eleven minutes of wholesome queer cartoon Steven Universe. Then you can retire to bed for your sixtieth nap of the day, awash with the pastel watercolour sounds of Kate Bush's 2005 gem 'Aerial-' a true daydream of an album. 

Favourite moments here are 'Pi,' where she sings the digits of pi, and 'Mrs. Bartolozzi,' where she sings about doing laundry. ... I promise this is a real and good album and not a joke.

3. Misc. songs by Sam Amidon

It's day 5 of your infection and you thought you were feeling better on day 4 but now you feel worse. You struggle to remember what day of the week it is. You struggle to remember the names of your primary schoolmates' dads, and then you wonder why you're even thinking about that. You have a fever dream where Hayden Christensen tells you that he invented popcorn at his same-sex marriage. You start to wonder whether it's going to be this wild next time you catch covid, and then spiral into despair when you realise there will definitely be a next time and this disease is never going away and the world is ruined forever. Anyway, Sam Amidon's gentle Kermit voice is a great end of days soundtrack!

The end. Hopefully it won't take a plague to get me to write here again? p.s. those three Steve Hauschildt albums are REALLY GOOD: Check out Strands, Nonlin and Where All Is Fled ✌

Yours infected,

TWENNY TEN: Puke's Favey Albumseys

OK.
So.
This was hard, and I'm going to tell y'all straight up that I nearly copped out and picked TWO! albums as my favourites of 2010. I know, I know, but I love them both so much for completely different reasons that it was impossible to compare them.
But when hip blog co-author Amy was queried via twitter on which way to go a la "heart versus brain" the response was "go with yr heart :' ("
So, dun dun dunnn,

Owen Pallett's Heartland wins my favourite album of 2010 Awarde.

Here's a wanky instagram photo of it sitting on my shit desk.


See that blurry/lined-up face on the cover? Well, according to both popular urban bible "SongMeanings.com," and Owen Pallett himself, this album is A STORY. About that dude. Who is named "Lewis." This is where it gets a bit confusing. The setting is some fictional kingdom somewhere (complete with place names used here and there, including the titular "Heartland"). And, basically, when we are listening to Owen Pallett sing on this album, we are listening to a dialogue between Owen himself and this fictional Lewis character.
Uhh
So basically I have no fucking idea either. But that doesn't really matter. These songs are insanely. Emotional. Notice up there how I said that I had to pick between a "brain" choice and a "heart" choice. The concept of Heartland may sound complicated but only it's only there if you really want to delve in to it. Since this is fast becoming a bad Pitchfork review where the music isn't actually talked about..
Heartland sounds fantastic. If you've followed Pallett's previous Final Fantasy forays, this is the next logical step from where he was going with the Spectrum EP. Horns, electronics, sometimes a bit kraut, sometimes a bit Yann Tiersen, it's all fantastic. And guess what! NO VIOLINS. Just kidding every fucking song has violin, this is Owen Pallett LOLOLOL.
He's kind of toned his voice down a bit since He Poos Clouds, not so shouty or shrill, but it works. I don't think we've heard that creepy bellow he pulls out on interlude "Mount Alpetine." Every instrument, from that jumped-up bassline in "Tryst with Mephistopheles" to the more-catchy-than-the-vocals horns/woodwinds in "Lewis Takes Action" has been so meticulously and artfully placed and timed. It's fucking fantastic.

My absolute favourite track here though is called "The Great Elsewhere." It's a turning point in the album in terms of both sound and content- shit seems to get heavy. I also think this song has a better slow build than anything Sigur Ros have ever done, so shove it, Jonsi! (Jus kidding, I luv you Jonsi!) There are sparky zinger electronics, haunting violins etc., and then BAM drum machine. Every time Owey P pulls out a drum machine I absolutely lose my shit (see: Don't Stop). And then there are lyrics about some epic battles, pirates, scars, and "face to his face, I put my hand into his" and OH MAN. It's pretty overwhelming. Listen loudly, on headphones. It's like this song is someone running off a cliff, Hyperballad style, on a stormy day. They're going to die, and it's going to be spectacular, and sad. I have it on good authority from nobody whatsoever that Katy Perry was listening to this song on repeat when she wrote "Firework" or whatever it is, take from that whatever you will.
Sorry, I'm trying hard to write about this album without sounding like a huge wanker but I LOVE IT SO MUCH
I guess in a sense I am pretty biased in that this album dropped right in the middle of My Maelstrom of Personal Problems. Long, long walks + this shit on loop = tattooed to my personality forevermore. Uhhh
MAYBE I'LL LEAVE IT AT THAT

If it wasn't for my super emotional attachment to Heartland, this next album would've been at the top of the podium (see: Brain choice)

Matthew Dear's Black City wins runner up a.k.a. #1.5


I have already written a review of this album on this blog THANK FUCK I AM SICK OF TYPING SHIT. But, I will say, this album is still soooo good. I remember when I first fired up opening track "Honey" and I was like "Man this album is going to be pretty shit," but by the the third nine minute epic track I was pretty convinced otherwise. Also I love how deceptive and soothing "Honey" is now. BLACK SITTAYYYY 4 LYF

I'm not going to write anymore blurbs, just three-word-poems for the rest of the runners up. Also, I will leave spacing between the albums to indicate how 'close' they are to each other in terms of 'rankings.' I'm so fucking conceptual.

3. Sam Amidon's I See The Sign: R. Kelly, covered
4. Antony & The Johnsons' Swanlights: "PUNCH HER GHOST!"


5. Wavves' King of The Beach: V is for
6. Deerhunter's Halcyon Digest: Bradford Cox, still!

7. Skream's Outside The Box: Who is she?

8. LCD Soundsystem's This is Happening: Live and livid


9. Sufjan Steven's Age of Adz: HE IS SEXY



10. I can't decide between Joanna Newsom, Warpaint, or Mount Kimbie. So pick your favourite out of these three.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DON'T WORRY GUYS, Amy's list will be Coming Soon, and I'm sure I will find some other shit to write about before 2011. Comic Foxhole, anyone?
...

Ugh, reading back, this post is basically just a handjob for Owen Pallett. SUCCESS??